My youngest daughter was diagnosed with a Macro adenoma of the pituitary gland. I spoke with her earlier this year about the difficult place she was in…. living in the thin space where courage and fear meet. How for each of us, this thin space is lonely … we face these things within our soul, should we choose to be present to it. Cherished ones can be beside us, and some caress the feelings we have inside, but it is in the stillness of the night where we can feel alone, no one really understanding this thin space.
On Thursday morning, while walking the land, my husband asked me my thoughts about what Good Friday meant to me.
My thoughts returned to this idea of a thin space where courage and fear meet. The disciples turned in fear. Not understanding the consequences of their choice. Christ, chose courage. The disciples journeyed on living in this thin space as their fears transpired before their eyes. Watching their beloved teacher be put to death, demonstrating how to live in the thin space, and be courageous, not negating the fear He faced : He cried out, ” do not forsake me”.
I believe courage and fear dance together as we sway with the rhythm of the beating of our heart.
The gift of Holy Thursday and the blessing of Good Friday
The table invites us to drawn near
Here
There is a blessing that carries
A weight
known disappointments
Our failings inevitable
Clothed in our needs
Fears cling to our bones
lacking the courage
We share the bread, the wine
And return to our soft lives
Leaving what we fear
To stand alone
Against the mocking crowd
O thin space
Here we stand
The veil is torn
And the gap an open raw wound
Where courage and fear collide
God
Grant me strength to be fully present
Be my companion on the road
That I might not turn my head in fear
But stand vulnerable in courage
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